2019 for me was an year where I found Unconditional love from God, learnt more about myself, let go of things and people that didn’t lead me anywhere and got out of my comfort zone. This year has been an amazing year and I thank God for His Grace and mercies.
I am a person that loves to take stock and this year is no different. I however decided to do things a little different and have a few of my friends share their take home from 2019.
Here are a few of my lessons this year.
- Unconditional Love
For the better part of the year I knew that God was calling me back to Him and all I did was run away. I did not understand why He was insisting on this story yet in my eyes I was okay. I went to church, I read the Bible, I woke up early to do my devotion, I mean I was a good Christian. For about 5 months He didn’t give up His pursuit for me even as I kept running away.
I remember 9th July 2019 at around 7pm feeling lonely, depressed and hopeless and I knew I couldn’t do this anymore. I had run and that clearly hadn’t gotten me anywhere. Sitting on my bed crying, I knew that this was it. I didn’t want to do it but what was I going to lose? I was actually going to be gaining a lot. I said a prayer and I cannot even explain how I felt afterwards. I felt peace I had never felt before. I felt like a load was taken off me and I knew at that moment that my life would never be the same. I had a void that nothing could fill, not the alcohol, not my family, not a partner, not even my son only Christ could.
Looking back now I know that the song Reckless love by Bethel was written for me. He left the 99 to come get me. I clearly don’t deserve Him because I keep failing Him but He has never left me nor forsaken me.
And oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God
Oh, it chases me down, fights ’til I’m found, leaves the ninety-nine
And I couldn’t earn it, and I don’t deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God, yeah
I cannot wait to see how God uses me for His glory.
I also resonate now with the song Excess love by JJ Hairston & Mercy Chinwo
- Don’t compare your chapter 1 with someone’s chapter 20
2019 was kinda a tough year for me as I saw God come through for others faster than He did for me and that made me compare myself with others. I saw others get married, buy land, build homes etc and I felt like God had forgotten about me.
Yes I was happy when people got what they had always wanted but also a part of me wanted that. Listening to Pastor Robert Madu preaching on “Get Out” reminded me that we often get angry at God for not coming through for us like He did other people. What if that was His plan all along? To come through for you differently? Yes they built a house, but what if they took a loan for it and God wanted to bless you with yours loan free? What if you keep wanting what they have but God didn’t put them together?
He has taught me to stop comparing my chapter with someone else’s. It’s hard but when we keep trusting in God we will be shocked at how He comes through for us.
The chapter you are in is beautiful, enjoy it, go through it and keep counting your blessings.
- Build your assets and chill
One of my greatest lessons this year. I sacrificed a lot in order to be able to start building an empire for my family. I had to save on eating out, buying clothes etc. so that I could be able to buy assets. It was a sacrifice but worth it. I am now seeing my sacrifices bear fruits.
If you want to have something concrete in the future buy assets now. I have seen a friend of mine (Heey Hiran) sacrifice a lot in order to be able to invest. He’s definitely a person I look up to when money is involved. He is goals y’all.
So remember the little sacrifice you make today will benefit you in the years to come. Never think that the sacrifice you make is not worth it. You will miss out on a few things in life but it’s all going to be worth it.
- Consistency will take you places
It’s said that success doesn’t come from what you do occasionally but from what you do consistently. My theme for 2019 was consistency and to say that hasn’t helped me would be a lie. Beginning of the year I had a goal to lose weight and I actually did because I became consistent in my eating habits and also working out. Within a period of 2 months I had lost about 10kgs. People thought I was going nuts but I was proving a point to myself. I knew that I had to start with something easy and gain the discipline then everything else would be a little bit easy.
If you aren’t consistent you will not achieve a lot.
- Any relationship is about intentionality
I feel like the older you get the more your circle becomes small but great In value. My confidant Mary always told me that if you aren’t intentional in any relationship then that relationship will eventually die and that is something I have learnt this year.
Intentionality ranges from making time, having dinner/ lunches going on events, sleepovers etc. It is all about going the extra mile no matter how busy someone is.
Are your relationships intentional? If not make a goal in 2020 to be intentional.
As the year ends I reflect upon everything that I have had to experience and it all makes sense, well at least some of it. I could say it has been a rollercoaster but it was worthwhile. Here are a few lessons I will take with me for the year 2020
BEING INTENTIONAL WITH MY FRIENDSHIPS
Before the year began, I had been praying to God to bless me with good friends, who complimented my personality and who I would do life with. Indeed it was a prayer answered. I however forgot of one challenging factor I have been struggling with, communication! I would describe myself as aloof and always wanting to keep it to myself. My distant tendencies have costed me very meaningful friendship and to some extent some suitable partners. To have friends who become family is a slice of heaven on its own and I wanted a piece of that. One thing to note is that once you decide to be actively involved in someone’s’ life, you have to be in it fully. No fifty- fifty chances. Over time I had identified my ‘tribe’ and I was ready to invest fully. Be it investing in time and money for dates, showing up for their occasions, supporting their businesses however possible, offering advice and a shoulder to lean on, calling them out on their mistakes, and walking on a spiritual journey and so on. I had purposed to do all this in order to keep it real and a hundred. Most friendships have fallen out just because we don’t put our minds to them. We need to be present and in the moment for our loved ones. Just show up.
DO ONE THING AT A TIME
“You can multitask”, they said. As an African woman this goes without saying. With a family to take care of, one’s career, toddlers around; there’s just so much to do yet very little time. It is very satisfying to complete an entire to-do list for the day. I however find it very challenging to successfully complete various tasks simultaneously, and its okay. I find it easier nowadays to get done with one task and take up another. As a result I feel calm, less anxious, with no need to put pressure on myself. I only do what I can and give it my best. Besides a jack of all trades is a master of none.
BREAKING OUT OF COMFORT MY COMFORT ZONE
I love being in my bubble. It makes me feel safe and sane, until I stepped out into the open. It is beautiful. I was literally the one standing on the way to my success story. This hit me hard. The new can be scary and in most cases we opt to just get used to what we know. I have learnt so much about myself and realized how strong and bold I am in the process. I have never been a morning person, but guess what my meditation and devotion falls under that time. I hated exercise, even more I hate walking. Now for starters I do nature walks and it’s breathtaking and somewhat relaxing in its own way. I love the idea of travel, trying out exotic foods and I’m definitely changing my wardrobe for a new look! This is still a work in progress and I can’t wait to unleash all that I am made of in the next years ahead. Cheers to more growth and discipline to maintain it.
MY NAME ITSELF IS A BRAND
Self-love is a continuous process. Like there is no end to loving yourself. Talk about being my own PR person! I am told there is no second chance to a first impression, and I agree. From my dressing to how I address others yet still down to what I eat is my responsibility. Hence I need to be Keen on what entails my daily routine. I am learning to sell my personality just as it is without adjustments to fit in and that which is mine will automatically be mine for the taking.
BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF MANIFESTION
One way or another we have heard about the law of attraction and how we need to be keen with our thought process. Our minds are so powerful that one idea or feeling can be made to appear physically into our existence and that is what manifestation is all about. We all have our hearts desires and I have mastered how to claim what I really want in form of scripting it down on paper and praying without ceasing. I manifested my current job and it has been the best so far. I continue to manifest my soulmate, wealth, abundance, good health and a peace of mind. I believe that good things are out there and my dreams are yet to become a reality. We just need to breathe life into them.
1. One makes plan n then God laughs.
His ways are not our ways. We may plan but God has better plans for us or He wants us to take a different direction from what we may have anticipated
2. God’s love us despite us sinning.
God’s love is so huge that, He concentrates more on the sinners, not that He loves them more, but He loves them despite them not reciprocating the same.
3. Friends can become your family
A friend can also become your family in terms of support and just being there for you, sometimes even more than your family
4. There is true love
True love exists and is best found when one is just about to give up, so tukae macho
5. Patience pays
Patience pays. We might be going through a trying time but we just need to be a little bit patient because there is always light at the end of the tunnel